


Dave Strider is a necrophiliac

by aarewakiitopandahiro



Category: Homestuck
Genre: F/F, F/M, Fast Food, Gen, Hehe dumb bitch time, I Don't Even Know, M/M, Multi, Other, Please i’m so lonely haha, Stupif, Suck my dick lmao, i need 2 eat
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-29
Updated: 2020-04-29
Packaged: 2021-03-01 23:13:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 676
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23905204
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aarewakiitopandahiro/pseuds/aarewakiitopandahiro
Summary: Inspired by @simp._egbert’s homestuck story, that’s all da context ur gna get. u don’t deserve any more
Kudos: 2





	Dave Strider is a necrophiliac

grimAuxiliatrix [GA] began trolling tentacleTherapist [TT] at 2:59  
TT: hey wife  
GA: What  
TT: meet me at the hype house  
GA: But Why??  
TT: Just do it bitch, damn  
GA: Fuck You  
TT: ily  
grimAuxiliatrix [GA] ceased trolling tentacletherapist [TT] at 3:04 

Kanaya ran out of the Applebee’s she was at, despite not really giving a shit she still rushed out, staff yelling behind her and threatening to call the cops, as she didn’t pay for her food. “SEND THE COPS, I’LL FUCK THEM BITCH DON’T TRY ME. THOSE WINGS WERE FUCKING SHITE” She yelled dashing to her (new) car. it’s new because she just fucking stole it. She started the drive to the hype house, getting mcdonald’s on the way. Upon arriving at the hype house she saw Nepeta and Rose were upstairs. “What the fuck did y’all want” She shouted from the entrance “KARKAT IS FUCKING DEAD SHOW A LITTLE SYMPATHY BITCH” Rose replied  
once again, Kanaya spoke “I got mcdonald’s”. Nepeta’s head perked up, her eyes clearly red and irritated from crying, with a soft raspy voice she asked “did you get cheese burger....?”  
“huh??? you didn’t ask for shit bruh, i got a big mac, you want it???” Kanaya answered. Nepeta began crying again “I TEXTED YOU TO GET A FUCKING CHEESE BURGER FOR NEPETA, SHE’S GRIEVING YOU ASSHOLE” Rose yelled holding Nepeta, who was now crying even harder. “Damn, sorry. I can take some shit out this Big mac doe? she want that?” Nepeta looked back at Kanaya. “Y...yea that’s fine...thank you..” and resumed crying. Kanaya jogged to the kitchen and took out the Mcdonald’s Big Mac and began taking shit out, Once she was finished she called Nepeta down to eat. Nepeta walked to the kitchen, Rose following with a box of tissues, and she began going fucking feral on the updated Big Mac. Cheese splatting on both Rose and Kanaya. “Damn ma, you we’re hungry”  
“Na that’s just how she eats”  
Nepeta released a contented purr after finishing her Big Mac.  
Kanaya broke the (almost) silence “Ok so why’d y’all bitches call me here?? I was enjoying a meal at the local applebee’s”  
“Ok sorry your applebee’s is more important than Karkat’s fucking death ma” Rose retorted  
“apology accepted”  
“huh?? you dumb bitch, his body’s upstairs go fuck it” .  
Kanaya walked up the stairs with Rose and Nepeta, and walked into the room Rose said was Karkat’s.  
“Does Dave know???” She turned to Rose and Nepeta  
“Yeah but he’s coming here from chipotle, we’re gonna ask him to kiss Karkat! :33!” Nepeta replied, “What the fuck???” Kabaya and Rose yelled in unison looking at Nepeta with a disgusted ass face.  
“yeah duh, kiss of life??” She defended herself “Bitch Idk what you’re on lmao”.  
“NEPETA I GOT YOUR CHIPTOLE BITCH” Dave yelled from downstairs. Nepeta rushed down the stairs tackling Dave and stealing the Chipotle from his hands. Dave stands back up and holds the door open for Gamzee and Tavros, Who were just car pooling home. “Y’all said Karkat was dead??? how’d he die ??? what’s going on ??? are you gonna call the police???” Tavros Whined. “Bitch stfu” Nepeta replied, her mouth full. “Dave! Nepeta wants you to kiss his body because apparently it’ll bring him back to life even thought he’s been fucked stabbed but whatever I don’t care” Yelled Kanaya from the top floor. Dave Rushed up the stairs, out of breathe he asked “this bitch wants me to kiss my bf’s dead body??”  
“Yea basically, so get ur ass in there lmao”  
Dave raised an eyebrow but walked in Karkat’s room anyway. He did gay time with his lips, Surprisingly it actually did bring him to life. “What the fuck??? i was finally fucking dead and your dumbass decided to be creepy?? fuck you” Karkat yelled. “lmao i told yall” Nepeta said from the entrance “ima go to arby’s now, see y’all bitches later lmao”  
Nepeta sprinted on all fours out the door covered in cheese and guacamole.  
END OF ACT 1

**Author's Note:**

> Haha bitch


End file.
